360 Degrees (Sasori x Reader) 1st Person
by Drastica
Summary: Today's mission: show Sasori that being a puppet doesn't mean he can't find someone to love him. Reader is whatever gender the reader (you reader, not character reader) is.


"I don't swing in any direction, but my head can turn 360 degrees." That is my go-to response for when people ask me to explain my sexuality. What I mean by that is that I don't feel sexual attraction towards any gender, or lack thereof, but I can find myself aesthetically attracted to anyone who catches my eye.

Some people take it literally. Naruto asked me if I was part owl. After I left the Leaf to join the Akatsuki, Tobi asked the same thing.

Most people realize I'm not serious about that, but still think I'm weird. Sakura couldn't comprehend my disinterest in carrying Sasuke's babies. Hidan doesn't understand how I can go more than a week without finding someone to have sex with.

A very small amount of people understand my preferences, but an even smaller amount appreciate them. Sasuke was happy that there was one less girl trying to throw herself at him. Sasori is glad that his puppet body doesn't affect our relationship or let me down.

***Flash Back***

"Sasori-san, I'm so sorry, I didn't see you there." Steaming water dripped from Sasori's hair and clothes, a result of him being hit by the pot of boiling water I'd tossed into the yard. I had been making soup, and had accidentally added baking soda to the water instead of onion powder. I had to start completely from scratch with new water, so the ruined water had to be thrown out. What I hadn't accounted for was the fact that Sasori had been standing right outside.

"You didn't get burned, did you?" Sasori sighed and shook his head as I set the pot down on the floor.

"I'm a puppet. This body can't feel heat, or anything else."

"Really? What's that like?"

"It's convenient for an S-rank criminal," he said, taking off his drenched cloak. "I don't have to train myself to withstand pain." He walked into the base, the cloak draped over his right arm. "On the other hand," he paused a moment, as if to contemplate whether the next bit was worth saying, before continuing the sentence, "I'll always be alone because of it." I hadn't been expecting that. After all, he seemed like the type to want to be alone.

"Why's that?" I asked, genuinely confused.

"Think about it. This body can't feel pain. In the same way, it cannot feel pleasure. What woman would stay when it is impossible for us to fully be together?"

"Oh, you mean sex?" He nodded. "Sex is overrated." He raised an eyebrow, thinking I was just saying it to make him feel better. "I'm serious, you know. I've never had it, and I never plan to. As far as I'm concerned, mental and emotional compatibility is more important than physical compatibility."

Sasori's face remained neutral, but he nodded, considering what I'd said.

"And if the person wasn't fully human, would that change your feelings?" He kept his eyes fixed on my face, gauging my reaction. I thought about it for a second.

"It depends on whether or not it affects their ability to hold a decent conversation."

We stood in silence for a moment, until it was broken by Deidara shouting across the base to ask how long dinner was going to take.

"I should get to that," I said, picking up the pot and walking towards the kitchen to refill it and add the _correct _ingredients to the soup.

As I was entering the doorway, I turned and shot Sasori a small smile.

"I enjoyed our conversation."

I overcooked the soup that night.

***End Flashback***

Sasori and I are the same, in a way. He may be made of wood, and I am made of flesh, but neither of us swing in any direction, and our heads can turn 360 degrees. For him, the second part isn't a figure of speech. He demonstrated that when I told him my little catchphrase. I guess that's his sense of humor.

His worries about his body were pointless in the end. Before long, that will be just another thing we have in common. We will watch together, thousands of years from now, as the world reaches its end.


End file.
